Can I share a secret with you?
Until this past summer, we didn’t have our family photos updated in 4 years.
My reason? Because I have been absolutely dreading to get in front of the camera.
I know what you’re thinking. I’m a photographer, so how can I be intimidated by the camera?
Ever since my full hysterectomy in 2019, everything on my body has changed; my skin, my hair, and especially my weight 🤦♀️. Surgical menopause is no joke and has morphed the woman staring back at me in the mirror to someone I don’t quite recognize. Needless to say, it’s created a lot of issues with my self-esteem and I’ve been hiding from family pictures like the plague.
As women, we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to be the best at everything we do; the best moms, the best wives, the best at our careers, and of course by looking our best. In today’s social media world, our lives are on display for all the world to see, like news anchors on our own TV channels. But it can play a heavy burden on our confidence and exacerbate body image issues. With all the filters and photo-editing apps, the expectations for women to always look their best are overwhelming. We compare ourselves to others, which continues to drag us down, and feel bad about ourselves.
I’ve always taken a lot of pride in lifting women up in front of my camera. Whether it’s a high school senior, a mom, or a professional updating their headshots, my goal is always to make that woman feel beautiful and confident in front of my camera. But I had become a hypocrite. Everyone else was beautiful no matter their size, shape, or color, except for me. Isn’t that ridiculous? Why would I choose to think that way about myself?
When we were planning our trip to San Diego this past summer, I decided it was finally time to give in and update our family photos. Jack has grown over 14 inches since our last session and has changed from a boy into a young man. He appreciated looking back on our old family pictures and kept asking me why we didn’t have any recent photos. I knew it was time to climb out from under the blanket and quit hiding. No matter my size, shape, or the number of new wrinkles on my face, I need to be okay with who I am at this moment in time. So, I got my big girl pants on and headed out into the San Diego sun to enjoy some time with my boys and document our family. I’m so glad I did.
To all the moms out there who fear getting in front of the camera, for whatever reason, I know this much to be true. We are superheroes. We are the glue that holds everything together. We work hard to raise our children and provide for our families. We love our husbands fiercely and we sacrifice ourselves for the good of others. We deserve to see our hard work documented, to be photographed with the ones we love and work so hard for. It’s a part of our legacy and the story we create for our kids. No matter where you are in life, it’s important to tell your story and have something to look back on. My hope is that no matter where you are in life, you know that you’re worth seeing, worth knowing, and worth sharing your life with others.
Here are a few sneaks of our photo session on our favorite beach in San Diego. I’m so proud of my crew, and me for facing my fear and putting myself out there. Cheers to you and your legacy.
